No damage is beyond repair before God.
I used to be a person who lives in the past, then allow myself to be sink in judgement, fun fact; nobody judges me, I'm always the judging myself and then allow the judgement to grow into condemnation. Then I'll start dwelling in self-condemnation. Trust me, it wasn't healthy at all, from the physical pain you'll feel on your chest as though someone is pounding and pinching your heart at the same time, and the emotional trauma you'll go through. The funniest part is I'll go out and laugh, play with people like nothing is wrong with me or bothering me, then I'll go back to my room announcing my presence to misery. "I'm home misery", that's usually my slang, it got worse that it started affecting my spiritual life and I feel like shit before God, I found it hard pray, talk less of worshiping.
The day I made that strong decision not to let situations define me and my relationship with God and people. I went back to my creator and cried "Eleda mi, nah like this you go dey look me" and I sat down blank, and I felt this presence of peace and a gentle whisper " In my Garden of grace, even broken trees bear fruits". That day, I felt the power of confession, and I said everything worry out loud as though a person was there physically and relieve came.
That is my story, what is your own story? You don't have to blame yourself all the time and even if you are judging yourself don't let that judgement turn to condemnation. It's okay to feel guilty sometimes but don't let it pass a sprinkle of it. If you're going through anything just talk to God and tell him all about it. Empty yourself before him and tell him he is your only hope and comfort, and peace will locate you.
A wise man once said to me "Never doubt what God can do with a broken life if you give him all the pieces".
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Love, light and Amala.
Oluseun Ayanfebaba
A nice story line